A change and thanks

It has been 9 months and 3 days since I left Patrick. 9 months and 3 days since I moved out. 9 months and 3 days since I started life over. It had also been 3 months and 13 days since I moved out on my own and COMPLETELY started over. I never thought it would feel like this. I never thought it would feel so good, actually.

For a few days after I started looking for a place to live, I cried...and cried...and cried. I did not want to live alone--I didn't want to feel loneliness. I learned something really important during this time. Are you ready for it??

My life is anything but lonely.

I wasn't lonely on December 19, 2010 and I am not lonely now. It is one of the greatest feelings I have ever felt.

I love where I live. I picked a tiny studio-condo in a very pretty area of town. My place is small. At first I called it a "shoebox", but I have since upgraded it to a hotel-JR Suite. It has everything I need, right where I need it and nothing more or less. If I didn't ever plan on buying another pair of shoes, adopt an animal or purchase another lamp or piece of furniture again, I would live here forever. (I just bought a new bike and it is leaning up against my couch right now, so you can guess how that's going to work.)

I live on a trail, so I can bike anywhere I need to go--Publix and three different Fro-Yo shops. Ok, ok...I can bike a lot more places than that.

Here is another feeling I did not expect on December 19, 2010. Happiness. I am HAPPY.

Looking back, I don't think I had ever been really, TRULY happy. Until now. Some people saw it, but I did not. I hear people say all the time, "I have never seen you this happy." "You always seemed sad before." "I am glad life is so good for you now." Maybe the awesome guy God put in my life is part of that. Ok, he's probably the major reason I am so happy, but I can be alone and feel okay about it. I can go for a bike road (or frozen yogurt) by myself and still have a smile on my face. I didn't think I would ever feel that. I don't recognize myself at all. Who is this girl? Where did the old one go and please, never ever, ever let her return.

I started 2011 by chopping my hair off. It was pretty fierce and with it came a new-found confidence. With the exception my height, pretty much everything else has changed. I enjoy running now. Wow, I never thought those words would ever come out of my mouth. I joined a running club the first Tuesday of 2011. I have purchased two bikes in 6 months. Why? I started trail-riding in January as a way to enjoy the outdoors and just purchased my first hybrid, so now I never have to take my car anywhere under ehhh....15 miles or so. I wonder how many fro yo places I can find within 15 miles! Before, I owned a $40 Tony Hawk "mountain bike" and the gears changed on their own as I was riding it. I started boxing this week. I learned to knit. Ok, no..I didn't learn to knit, but maybe it's next! I do need a sweet scarf for a camping trip next month! I am running my first OFFICIAL 5k in November and I am going to rock it. I drink beer. And LIKE it!! A lot!! Every time I go out with friends for a drink, I try a different beer and have figured out that it doesn't all taste like Bud Light. Even my weight has changed (that change I don't like so much).

So here's to all the people that helped me along the way:
 Thank you to my family, more importantly my parents, who put up with me and my two animals for 6 months when I told them it would be two...tops. Thanks to my Dad for taking the trails with me and Mom, for getting lost on the trails with me.
Thanks to my brother and sister for being there for me, not bringing up the "elephant in the room" on Christmas and by making it amazing.
My Aunt for letting me crash in her spare room multiple nights when I worked late. I am sure she woke up every single night I came in at 3 a.m. to crash into her soft, comfortable guest bed.
The rest of my whole family for being supportive and making sure I was ok.
 My friends, you all--every single one of you--stuck by me, never gave up and were there for me from the second I locked that front door on Deer Run S. Some of you sent me flowers, some of you took me out, all of you reminded me of what life was like and how it is supposed to be.
My boyfriend. Where do I begin? You put up with a heart-injured girl who was afraid to fall in love. You took a risk--a huge one--by going on a date with me and I am so grateful.

You are all so wonderful and helped me become who I am. A fatter, much happier, bike riding, beer-loving, running, boxing, non-knitting, crazy-ass fool. Here's too many more years of awesomeness.